Does grief ever go away?
The answer, not usually. Grief is defined as “deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death.” Grief is the physical, mental, emotional, and for some, spiritual experience after loss. It is not one feeling in an of itself, it is complex. Grief can be ignited by anything we perceive as a loss: death, breakups, divorce, health issues, body changes, moving, career changes, or birth of a child. Life changes can bring up grief as well, change requires the letting go of or leaving behind something, someone, or a version of yourself. There is macro grief, like cultural or environmental losses and micro grief, losses on a smaller scale in your personal life. Grief is unique to each individual and situation, it never looks the same. Sometimes we even anticipate grief which is it’s own special kind of pain.
Grief and love are two sides of the same coin. Where love exists, so does grief, hence the answer to this question. More often than not, our relationship to grief changes instead of it going away. Grief is downright ugly. It can rip you apart and cut deep into your soul. As time goes on sometimes you don’t feel it, often you do. Grief demands to be witnessed, so give it some space. Honor your grief. This can look like a spiritual practice, some kind of ritual, or simply just feeling it without distracting, escaping, or trying to make it better. Processing your grief requires community, connection, and self-compassion. Grief has a way of forcing us to examine ourselves. It can help shape our values and relationships. It can help us define our worldview. Grief ultimately is a part of all of us. Loss is an integral part of the cycle of life and making meaning from our experiences is what helps us grow. So befriend your grief, it’s going to be with you a long time.
Questions to ponder:
Where in my body do I feel my grief and how can I honor those sensations?
What losses have I experienced that changed me?
How has grief influenced who I am?
